August 22nd, 2009

Watchman - *AFP Hall Of Fame*


(submitted by Wanda)

504 Responses to “Watchman”

  1. El Kev says:

    I used to enjoy this site to no end. Now, that is no longer possible. This picture has rendered me blind.

    • Kiwi says:

      For a while there I thought you’d disappeared El Kev. Good to see some of the originals are still hanging in there…if you’ll excuse the phrase in relation to banana hammocks.

  2. Ssejors! says:

    Personally, I think the only thing missing is a matching Leopard print bow tie.

  3. DC says:

    MY EYES!!! **squinting and looking away** It burns!

  4. Wendolyn says:

    What’s awkward here, regardless of a photoshopping or not is the body pose.

  5. TheDorsalFin says:

    This guy is seriously inappropriately dressed for a picture on the shag carpet in the living. How in the world could he have thought it would be alright to pose for a picture in nothing but a gold watch and his spotted thong? Clearly, this outfit needs a couple of gold chains added to it.

  6. emm says:

    its hammock time! (aka, cant touch this!)

  7. sillygurl says:

    I hear the caveman singing….”Just let me be myself…” I still love those totally innocent days, but it would be hard to give up the men’s bodies I see these days on Trublood…

  8. tonybaloney says:

    What I find worse than faux-finishing a wall is faux-finishing the electrical plate. But he’s definitely an eighties hottie.

  9. eeyore19 says:

    Who watches the watchman?

    • DonKeyHoTay says:

      …and they will look on the Awkward Family Photos site and cry, “SAVE US!”…and I’ll whisper, “No.”

  10. Maya B. says:

    Rico Suave, baby.

  11. Minus says:

    Don’t think it’s photoshopped. His toes seemingly disappearing is because he’s standing on the livingroom thick carpet. And yeah, in the 80’s this would be quite normal, he’s just applying for a watch-advertisement job.

  12. doggiekittymama says:

    The analysis is as much fun as the photo viewing. There are so many details a banana hammock will blind a person to. Those walls are horrible.

  13. Treacle says:

    A watch, a mullet, a banana-hammock, and an electrical outlet, hmmmmmmm…

  14. melissa says:

    who cares if its photoshopped. maybe this will inspire the real deal…boyz, go grab your cameras and meathuggers…..

  15. joy says:

    Reminds me of Johnny Drama in Entourage. I could see him rocking this look in the 80s.

  16. bikermomrt says:

    His nipples seems to be winking.

  17. flodnak says:

    This photo is from the era when, as Douglas Adams would say, we were so amazingly primitive that we still thought digital watches were a pretty neat idea.

  18. Megan says:

    Meet Brad. Just a regular guy. Lookin for a regular gal. Wearing a regular banana hammock.

    Yeah. I said it.

  19. Lynda Kaye says:


  20. Lady Ice says:

    Now, even if this was ‘Shopped….

    someone still had that body and banana hammock on…posing like…that…

    and someone was still sporting that mullet.

    Jeeze, could that hammock be up any higher on his hips?!

  21. Etraking says:

    The Neanderthal was still fascinated by the ticking metallic object on his wrist and the leopard underwear he received after his time travel to the future

  22. Cara says:

    I love the outlet behind his left leg

  23. Stacy says:

    “It’s bizness, it’s bizness time…”

  24. Kimberly says:

    Highway to the Danger Zone…indeed.

  25. Jennifer says:

    It’s not so much and awkward photo but an awkward pose. It looks like he is timing himself on how long he can hold his breath.

  26. Sarah says:

    Invisible arm shelf!

  27. Tulip says:

    This is the new ad for Tag watches…

  28. Kale says:

    PLUG IT IN! Nice outlet!

  29. Leslie says:

    Nothing like a mullet and a leopard-printed banana hammock to say YES! I’m a young man of the 80’s!!

  30. seano says:

    Now this is a dude who travels light – all he needs is his cheap gold watch, his leopard spot g-string and a quick brush through os his glorious mullet.

    He is like a lion of the night, prowling for you LAAAAADDDDIIIIIEEEEES!!!

  31. Baron's Life says:

    timeless indeed…a great watchman…! brilliant…!

  32. Rubysarms says:

    After putting in a stellar audition, he was shocked he didn’t get a call back for the musical “Hair”.

  33. Ellen says:

    I think it’s photoshopped. There’s a blurry line on the left side of the neck where it doesn’t quite match. Nice try, but the body and head are from different pics. That’s why the head looks too big for the body.

  34. Lady in a small town says:

    Can. Not. Look. Away.

  35. The kid says:

    Why do I get this uncle Rico from ’82 vibe when I see this

    • Mark says:

      Hold still right there. Now, just imagine you’re weightless, in the middle of the ocean, surrounded by tiny little seahorses.

  36. laurie says:

    Boomhower, is that you?

  37. Christa1023 says:

    I’m actually surprised….I would think someone THAT vain would want to show off his rockin’ abs instead of hiding them w/ this goofy pose!

  38. Rebekah says:

    Wow. That mullet is so distracting.

  39. Kasey says:

    Business in the front, Party in the back… Gotta love the mullett…

  40. Leslie says:

    He’s late for a bachelorette party!

  41. Steph says:

    After seeing this, I’ll be going to bed with visions of Swayze and Farley dancing in my head.

  42. Boo says:

    aaaa……….don’t know what to say

  43. Leeny says:

    This guy reminds me of The Todd in Scrubs. “If you’re going to stay with The Todd there’s only one rule, you’ve got to hammock up!”

  44. Scarletcat says:


  45. Johnny Cat says:

    What time is it, darlin’? It’s Sexy Time! Sorry, but I feel Borat vibe.

  46. ocb says:

    His neck looks way too short for such a long head/face. This image is awkward for more than one reason. I agree with the photoshop theory.

  47. Bummer says:

    I’m going to be boo’d for this I’m sure, but why is this an awkward family photo? It’s just a Chippendale dude from the 80’s (at home, with a sweet camera, and awesome faux finish on the walls).

  48. Chicky D. says:

    This guy reminds me of Borat! Borat and Hasselhoff!

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