29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute… Used To
People are annoying. No matter how much you love somebody—no matter how much you’ve been through together, the ups and downs, trials and tribulations—you are bound to get irritated with them sooner or later.
A recent AskReddit thread started by Reddit user frieschomper_ posed the question, “Married people of Reddit, what’s something your SO does that you used to find cute when you were dating but now irritates/infuriates/ annoys you?” Here are 29 of the funniest, realest, and most illuminating answers.
29. Farting at all the wrong times:
Divorced for some years now, but…
My ex-wife used to have no qualms about farting loudly whenever, wherever. No medical condition or anything and she’d even giggle afterward. In our early 20s this was cute and edgy. When we hit our late 20s it was annoying and immature.
She did it during the eulogy of my Dad’s best friend, who was like a second father to me, and then got mad at me for being upset about her being disrespectful. Every time I wonder if I made the right decision to leave her I remember that ridiculous degree of self-centered immaturity.
28. Err, this absolutely not normal poop-watching activity:
Constantly watching me in the bathroom. It was fun at first, we always make/made jokes. But now there are times I just want to be left alone to shit for fucks sake.
EDIT: (I swore I added this but now that I’m back online I don’t see it so here goes again). When I made this comment I did NOT realize how many comments it would cause. I honestly thought it was normal for a SO to do this in a relationship.
We’ve been married for going on ten years this September. I didn’t realize this wasn’t considered normal because this has always happened in our relationship.
27. Avoiding social interaction, no matter how minute:
My husband hates social interaction (even relaying information to and from friends sometimes) and will avoid it at all cost. At first it was cute, he would beg me to make the calls to order food or find out information. Now I find it very inconvenient – especially when I’m not in the mood to talk to people either.
Honey if you are reading this I love you very much. What do you want for dinner?
26. Constant and relentless sarcasm:
It would be nice to bring up a topic and not get a zinger in response. “What do you want from the grocery store?” “Five pounds of filet mignon, some motor oil, and, oh, a million dollars.” No, duckface, its 100 degrees out and the kids need food. I’d much rather sit next to you on the couch. WHAT DO YOU FUCKING WANT!
25. Hair, and lots of it:
Her hair. She has such long, beautiful hair but it gets everywhere. Drains. Sinks. Carpets. Ive had to sit and cut hairs out of the vacuum so it would work again because it had tied up the rolly bit. Not to mention I’ve had her hair on me and all through my clothing.
24. Making a joke of nearly everything:
My husband always tries to make me laugh. I honestly hope he never stops trying, but there are times when it’s like “really?? You’re trying to make me laugh NOW?!”
He especially makes jokes when things are tense. Example- we had our first miscarriage right before our first anniversary. He made me laugh all through dinner, but yeah it was his way of dealing with a sad situation.
23. Or, forgetting nearly everything:
His forgetfulness used to be cute and fun. Waking up to fresh gallons of milk sitting on the counter for hours is annoying as f*ck now.
22. Having to be a know-it-all:
Dating: Wow he knows a lot! I love that he always seems to have the answer. We won’t have many problems to worry about when we combine our knowledge!
Now: Omfg babe it won’t kill you to be wrong. Not everything has to be an argument just because your answer has been challenged!
21. Avoiding confrontation at all costs:
Her anti-confrontational attitude. It was a breath of fresh air to be with someone who had a pretty laid back attitude about things and didn’t seek to make a fight out of the smallest things.
11 years later, still can’t get her to properly communicate her own desires and/or gripes during an argument, or confront a family member about something out of line they’ve done.
20. Singing as though it is a competition:
Her having to sing everything like it’s a perfected choral piece.
19. Apparently, this is not uncommon:
Had a friend dating a girl that loved to try to show off her singing. The main problem was we’d be playing games like Rockband where matching the key and tone of the recording is more important than stylizing and, essentially, costing a bunch of nerds a team bonus.
18. …Like, at all:
This!!!! My sister in law always draws it out and adds “and maaaaaaanyyyyyyyy mooooooorrrrrrrrre” in a quasi sexy wannabe Marilyn Monroe tone. UGGGHHHH.
And I’m talking at our childrens’ birthday parties. Drives me nuts!
17. Changing their mind over a SO’s lifestyle:
Reversing the roles, I play football/soccer at a high level and she used to find it cute to watch me play and train.
Now that she’s realised the fact that I have to travel on and off, and train every day for most of the day either with my club or on my own I can safely say she despises the sport…
16. Whether due to profession, or hobby (or both):
Musicians get this all the time. For some reason, playing music on a stage in some hipster bar is a great way to meet women.
Fast forward 6 months into a relationship and they can’t stand that you have to go to band practice, that your passion makes no money, and that it keeps you out late.
The very reason they liked you to begin with becomes their least favorite part about you. I’ve seen this over and over again.
15. Being a little too chill:
My husband’s laidback attitude. I truly appreciate that he doesn’t stress about much; he definitely adds balance to my (pre)crastination.
At times though I wish he was more timely. We’re going on a road trip? Maybe we should book a hotel in advance, not 20 minutes before getting there. We moved across the country and I set up the Relocube, pick up, and, drop off.
I asked him to research potential apartments. The week we were to have our Relocube delivered we still didn’t have an apartment or even one in mind. Our Relocube was set to be delivered on Saturday, we signed our lease on Friday.
I’ve learned to take the lead on planning, but it would be a nice “break” for me mentally if I didn’t also have to do it.
14. Never, ever, shutting up:
She talks c o n s t a n t l y. I’m a guy who can appreciate a good silence but she hates it. She has to fill every silence by talking or humming or singing or playing music or putting on a TV show.
Most of the time she isn’t talking to me, really. Example; as I type this she is playing Fallout and just kinda narrating her experience. It’s still pretty cute and charming at times, tbh, but when we first started dating I found it far more adorable.
This issue is that since she’s constantly making noises with her mouth, I have grown accustomed to just tuning her out or doing other stuff or leaving the room mid-sentence because, once again, she USUALLY ISNT REALLY TALKING TO ME.
Unfortunately, sometimes she IS talking to me and then I look like the dickhead for not listening. But I think if I listened in-depth to every tiny thing that came out of her mouth to verify she was or was not speaking to me I would lose my mind.
13. Always needing to be needed:
In the beginning he used to really need me and he always required a LOT of attention.
I loved it, at first. I loved to feel needed and I 100% absolutely loved to lavish him with my adoring attention endlessly… I was absolutely devoted.
Fast forward 15 years… I feel used up and taken for granted. He has never reciprocated, our relationship has always been strongly one way.
His behaviour was exactly what I wanted and needed – at one point. Now it’s just something that upsets me. A lot.
12. Being far too likable:
Not married, but engaged and have been together for almost 5 years now? Everyone likes her. She’s a very likable person, but my friends and family like her more than me. Just gets to me sometimes when she tells me something about a friend or family member that I should have heard from them.
Edit: Just to be clear, I don’t mind it. I like it because she makes socialising easier for me, that way I can sit back, relax and just listen and enjoy the company. The side effects, as mentioned above, can be annoying but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
11. Being hella clumsy:
Clumsily break things accidentally. It’d be a teaspoon one day or a shoelace the next. Little insignificant, ‘how-on-earth-did-you-manage-to-break-that?’ type of things. Started out quite cute and amusing. Now it’s a case of ‘Babe, that’s like the fourth vacuum cleaner this year, and it’s a f*cking Dyson.’
10. Sucks at storytelling:
He can not tell a story. Rambling, unnecessary details, and the listener is three steps ahead the entire time, just waiting for it to slowly unspool.
9. Sucks at eating:
Takes forever to eat a meal. It was very well-suited to long dates, romantic dinners, those intense getting-to-know-you conversations at the beginning. 15 years later and I just want to have a meal where I’m not done before he’s barely taken a bite!
His whole family is like this and I simply don’t understand. It’s food, you put it on a plate and you eat it and go on with life! Not for them, mealtimes often stretch on for hours, occasionally into the next bloody meal if it’s a family event. I just don’t get it.
ETA: He’s not European, just a sloooooow eater!
8. Never being able to choose. Anything.
Her indecisiveness. It was adorable to see her struggle when we were dating but goddammit I’m just trying to figure out what to make for dinner.
7. Using the dreaded baby voice:
Talk in a baby voice, shit was cute at the beginning, but when you’re asking me if you can have my last beer in the fridge in a tiny baby voice, fuck no, now I need it.
EDIT: Just making an edit to say I love her and no, I don’t hate her for this.
6. Refusing to accept help or admit defeat:
First off, still very happily married and in love! However, there is one thing that does cause a ruckus every now and again. When we were dating and living together, we would do diy stuff around the house.
I know a little past the basics because my dad made sure to teach me things and of course there is always youtube, so I’m not helpless by any stretch. In fact I owned several of my own power tools before we got together.
When doing one of these projects, he often wouldn’t let me do much. Back then I thought, “What a gentleman, doesn’t want me to get dirty.” or whatever. Nowadays I’ll be watching him do something and know a better way of doing said task, and it’s like he doesn’t believe me.
So he’ll try 18 other ways before landing on the way I suggested and it working out just dandy. It’s pretty frustrating. I can do more than hold something while you work!
It’s not a deal breaker, but sometimes I let him know just how stupid he was acting, and how much time it wasted by not just trying my way first. Even if my suggestion doesn’t work, what did you lose?
5. Falling asleep way too quickly:
Falls asleep INSTANTLY. He works long hours (Japanese. In Japan) and is always tired, which I get. But he falls asleep literally while eating or in the middle of a sentence.
Was really cute. And I still can’t actually be mad at him because I know it’s because he’s working so hard. But when we only get late evenings to talk over a quick dinner and I’m constantly having to wake him up every 5 minutes… gets less and less cute.
4. Needing to see all things from all points of view at all times:
Plays the devil’s advocate.
When we first started dating it was fun and challenging to debate the points. Now it’s tiring and just “can we agree GENOCIDE IS BAD?! There is no “middle ground” option” ”
Well if I can play devil’s advocate-”
“I will cut a bitch dear. So help me god, I will cut a bitch.”
We still have plenty of intellectual debates, we don’t staunchly agree on everything and we’re able to open each other’s minds. But playing devil’s advocate got old quick lol
ETA: devil’s advocates can definitely help see a different perspective in the world. But I dont need that on EVERY point. Especially if it’s a personal problem and I’m just trying to rant.
3. Spontaneity bordering on insanity:
His spontaneity. It used to be really fun and sexy…but now it’s like living with a real life Homer Simpson/Phil Dunphy hybrid. No joke, I am just waiting for the day he comes home with a bag of ‘magic beans’
Edit: I’ve had a lot people asking for more stories of my husband doing crazy shit. I think my favorite is: on our first date we got caught in a rain storm, I was wet to the bone and wearing a skirt…so he offered me his pants.
2. Being overly jealous and possessive:
His jealousy was a little cute at first because it was very mild and appeared harmless. I figured he would learn over time that he could trust me completely and it would lessen or go away. It took a completely opposite turn and he became violently jealous of every man who so much as looked in my direction. We are now divorced.
1. General scatterbrain-ness:
Disclaimer: not really married but in a long term committed relationship where we live together and have concrete plans for marriage next year.
He’s very scatterbrained… Smart man (imo) but would have went overseas with 10 pairs of jeans, two t-shirts, and no underwear if I didn’t watch him very closely when he was packing and double checking it multiple times before he left.
He is extremely careless and I used to think it was cute and I liked feeling like I was on top of things sometimes. Now it’s frustrating feeling like I’m his mom and I have to walk him through the most basic shit and watch like a hawk to make sure he doesn’t f*ck it up.
I guess it’s practice for when I become a mom as I have to weigh and balance learning opportunities so I am not fucked over myself. I love him dearly and I wouldn’t trade him for the world but I do wish he would maybe use his brain more often.
And he is learning, slowly but progress is being made.