Shred, White, and Blue

May 23rd, 2009

Shred, White, and Blue - *AFP Hall Of Fame*

We couldn’t think of a more awkward way to commemorate Memorial Day weekend.

(submitted by Julia)

206 Responses to “Shred, White, and Blue”

  1. Patkerash says:

    What the ????? Was there a dungeons and dragons character known for his patriotism ???

  2. Mike says:

    “Do NOT go into that bathroom!”

  3. sara says:

    to whoever keeps doing this: please stop making all those obnoxious compound bow references, we get it already!!!!!

  4. constabEL says:

    That’s a compound sword, dammit!

  5. Jason says:

    Something tells me this kid got his aXX kicked a few times in school.

  6. lorelei says:

    CHAIN MAIL and MULLET!!

  7. Albert says:

    I am really surprised that no one has made any “brandishing his weapon” jokes yet. Seriously, it’s like right there waiting to be said.

  8. Hat says:

    Amazing. I’d love to have those shoes, too

  9. CRU says:

    Last Time I power wash my jeans

  10. Hucksgirl13 says:

    Those aren’t Jams under his jeans, nor are they chain mail… they are snake skin print spandex ala David Lee Roth…

  11. annie says:

    what did he do? not like the first pair of pants on so he used the sword to slice down to the second pair?

  12. itsme88 says:

    Ooooo my….I got nothing.

  13. KissKill says:

    is that the mac guy?

  14. Stephanie says:

    I’m thinking the handcuffs ARE his belt. Doesn’t it look like they are kind of a pair that his horizontal, like where a belt buckle would be? Mind you, I’m looking at this gem on a laptop and not our big monitor, but that’s only because I’m afraid to.

  15. Sarah says:

    God Bless America! That’s all I have to say about THAT! :)

  16. brando77 says:

    Lord Of The Rips.

  17. Tulip says:

    Its not chainmail…it’s snakeskin.
    Also, i love the LA Gear High Tops…how special.

  18. Jim says:

    America………….FU** YEAH!

  19. Mickster says:

    The Few, The Proud, The Mullets.

  20. Andrea says:

    This photo ROCKS!!! I can almost hear Wasted Years by Iron Maiden playing in the background!!

  21. Cypress says:

    Wait…is that Vanessa Williams?

  22. Patti says:

    “Just a small town girl
    Living in a lonely world
    She took the midnight train going anywhere”

    Heres the important part…….
    “Just a city boy
    Born and raised in South Detroit
    He took the midnight train going anywhere”

  23. dusty says:

    conner! conner’s back!

  24. Sean says:

    “There can be only one!” – Highlander

  25. James says:

    Is he…is he wearing chainmail under those jeans?

  26. Heather says:

    Protecting America from marauding Highlanders. Because they’re everywhere. But there can be only one.

  27. missthis says:

    I thought he was holding a mop until I scrolled further down.

  28. Greg says:

    “Ahoy females, there’s a new Sheriff in town and he’s Not Afraid to wear chain mail under his jeans”

  29. Katie says:

    Jimmy takes a break from shredding his surroundings, as well as his clothes, and poses for a portrait.

  30. Selena says:

    Mullet greatness right there.

  31. Dale Lazarov says:

    TORN…in the USA…!

  32. eric bizzle says:

    Slayer Rules ??

  33. ben says:

    is that chain mail under his jeans?

  34. Mick says:

    I so rocked the sam pants and hand cuff belt back in the 80′s, but I had the big teased up hair….Rock on bro, rock on….

  35. jojoroxx says:

    Wow….I see the 1980′s have finally made it to the south!!

  36. James says:

    OMG ! The handcuffs…CLASSIC! He’s ready to arrest you at sword-point if you are not patriotic. lol.

  37. James says:

    I spit up my drink upon seeing this image. lol.

    Then I noticed the sword and fell out of my chair.

    Picture pefect. lol.

  38. Brittany says:

    At first glance I thought this was my dad.. No joke. He has a picture just like this somewhere..

  39. Stinky says:

    Does anybody notice the snakeskin leggins, and the smooth crotch line? Are those LA Gears?

  40. Sill says:

    that’s not a sword. That’s a compound bow.

    Loud belly-laughs at 1AM are really rude. That’s what I’m being told, anyway.

    (And the eighteenth commenter to correctly identify the weapon in the photo wins a special Memorial Day commemorative locket with THIS PHOTO INSIDE.)

  41. arugula says:

    This picture freaking rocks. (: Its weird, and random, but doesn’t really strike me as awkward. He’s got one of the more relaxed facial expressions I’ve seen on this site so far. And something about a butchered flag, a sword, and 80′s shredded rocker jeans just works lol.

  42. El Sergio says:

    Bling Bling, Those aren’t Handcuffs. It’s a compound bow.

  43. KONGQIAN says:

    i am a chinese ! i want make friends!

  44. tee says:

    Is he wearing Jams under shredded jeans? That is an 80′s twofer right there.

  45. Bling Bling Slim says:

    Are those handcuffs attached to his beltloops? That kicks aXX.

  46. good job says:

    this webpage is awesome.
    keep up the good work

  47. Silk says:

    Is that flag legal? Shredded like that?

  48. El Kev says:

    Candice, that’s not a sword. That’s a compound bow.

  49. Candice says:

    Is this some kind of Excalibur thing? Only HE can pull that fake sword out of that classy block made of lumber yard scraps?

  50. Laura says:

    Business in the front, party in the back. Did he use the sword to slice up his jeans? Skills.

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