The Protector

November 9th, 2010

The Protector - *AFP Hall Of Fame*

You should see this father when a telemarketer calls after 6.

(submitted by Jairus)

267 Responses to “The Protector”

  1. LS says:

    Cool photo. Poor little kid though. :’(

  2. jenne says:

    a friend of mine sent this to me…..I thought she photo shopped my boyfriends face on this guy….I can’t stop staring at him, I think it’s his twin separated at birth!! LOL this is way to funny!

  3. Coyote says:

    There once lived an immortal…the Highlander, although more commonly known in his homeland as Sir Fox Crotch of the Hill People.

  4. Valarie Weinhaus says:

    This is an AMAZING shot. 1. He’s hot. 2. She’s gorgeous. 3. Except for the fox on the crotch, I love it.

  5. cas b says:

    There’s almost nothing funnier in the universe than a badger sporran.

  6. bennie cooley says:

    i just printed this picture out and i (and my friend) intend to carry it around in the front of my binder and then i will frame it. this picture has changed my life. forever. i even emailed a copy to my boyfriend.

  7. Scott says:

    Is that a tiger on your crotch or are you just happy to see me?

  8. Dunski says:

    Eeeeeeeeeeeek! Honey, a mouse!!!! Get it, get it, get it!!!

  9. Johi says:

    This is actually a pretty amazing photograph. Epic even.

  10. Kayla says:

    Mom is GORGEOUS!

  11. Melissa says:

    At first I laughed. I laughed hard. But the more I look at it, the more appealing it is. It plays into my “Outlander” fantasies and how can you go wrong with a kilt? Even on that guy?

  12. M says:

    So funny! I know him too, he was an assistant pastor at my old church. And this picture pretty much sums up his personality perfectly. Good work, Jairus!

  13. customcartoons says:

    Agree with the above. Somehow this picture leaps in Jerry Bruckheimeresque slo-mo straight over Awkward’s head, and comes crashing down in the land of EPIC. You WISH you could be in this photo! ^_^

  14. anonb says:

    My first thought…historical Harlequin. My second…I should find this cheesy, but can’t help myself seeing it as epic.

  15. kellyn says:

    I think this is awesome. I want a guy like that, too.

  16. JR says:

    Why is he straddling a fox? LOL Showing off his impressive thigh muscles by crushing the poor fox to death AND protecting his family at the same time. *grunt*

  17. Skip says:

    He didn’t even need the axe. The kilt will stave off 99% of non-scottish aggressors.

  18. bernadette says:

    Seriously… BEST. FAMILY. PHOTO. EVER! I’m so doing this if I ever get the opportunity :)

  19. wingzofsteel says:

    That is the most useless piece of weaponry I’ve ever seen. I’ll bet Justin Bieber can take him.

  20. Bart H. says:

    Awkward? More like EPIC!

  21. Liz says:

    LOL! This cracks me up, I can just hear some cheezy bagpipes playing in the background. The man welds an axe but he’s leaving himself wide open with his legs spread out. One good swift kick at the “boys” would bring him down.

  22. Miss Thang says:

    It looks like he wanted to re-enact a past life occurrence.

  23. tatyana says:

    i LOVE this photograph.

    the scared child pressed against the mothers face. expression=priceless

    the vicious father.

    the beautiful mother looking innocent in white… hair flowing naturally

    ah, i want a pick like this!!!

    love the background… and the timeless appeal. :) :) :) except.. the guys pants/kilt… whatever it is, it looks like my brother’s pajama pants :(

    to be honest, i find that the mother and child draws my attention more than the ax. haha. i love them :) it has a bit of gothiness and a delicate mother-child bond, and a bunch of nature and wild things. .. so many things juxtaposed <3

    if she was an actress/model, i'd be her fan!

    • Miss Thang says:

      There should be a website for over-the-top, ridiculous comments people leave.

    • villanz says:

      That was the most ridiculous comment I have ever read in my life and btw nothing in that picture juxtaposes.. Learn

    • j.d. says:

      I actually agree with you! Except for the guy who looks like he’s giving birth to some furry thing, I love the picture in general, especially of the woman in flowing dress holding the child. It’s like something out of a fantasy movie.

  24. Kat says:

    That codpiece doesn’t look very protective…….

  25. John Doe says:

    I honestly wish I could pull off a picture like that! I know this guy too, and he’s awesome. Congratulations, Man!

  26. Jimbo says:

    In a world where you can be attacked by a Crotch Wolf at any minute, you have to arm yourself.

  27. Russ says:

    I cant believe he finally got married. I know this man. he and i went to the same college. he was always surrounded by hot women, like way hot. damn it i knew his kilts would pay out in the end. great guy, listens to SO MUCH FREAKING METAL its unreal. gratz dude if you read this God bless

  28. chazz says:

    That guy has a bad case of crabs

  29. Dayln C says:

    I’m not gonna lie; I love everything about this. It looks like the cover of a direct-to-dvd action movie.

  30. jynxx says:

    Pure. Awesome.
    That is all. :D

  31. disgruntled employee says:

    This is epic. I love it. and that child looks truly terrified.

  32. Aussie Robbo says:

    Fabio’s evil brother
    starring in “The Young and the Headless”

  33. Aussie Robbo says:

    Epic warrior movie: “The 3″

  34. Aussie Robbo says:

    That’s the last time a dingo tries to take THAT baby!

  35. Amy says:

    once again…totally RAD. and his wife is hot. see where kilts and medieval weaponry will get ya? hot women.

  36. Jabadji says:

    Wow. So I know this guy. I’m going to guess that this was a photo shoot for one of his death metal bands gone wrong. :)

  37. ShlongFry says:

    that guy’s hair is awesome.

  38. Rio says:

    Um… is it just me, or does that chick look like Kristen Stewart??

    • Chris says:

      SHE DOES!!!

      The way Twilight should have been… Without the Pixie (called a vampire) named Edward…………..

    • Tiffany says:

      Yes, she does! And personally, I think the guy looks like Sully from Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. But that’s just me. :)

  39. Krejaton says:

    Now that Lost is over, the guy that played Sayid is staring in a new show, “Found”.

  40. kaja says:

    the panel fence really brings out the ‘wild and dangerous’ of this setting…

  41. Merrie says:

    He kinda looks like the Highlander guy Duncan “There can be only one!”

  42. micku says:

    I have to be honest, I love this picture!

  43. Charlene says:

    That blond baby clearly isn’t his.

  44. Joyce says:

    Wow, look at the sporran on that guy!

  45. Bubba says:

    Mrs. Protector is hawt!

  46. Modine says:

    No. Just no. I’m as big a fan of Highland regalia as anyone, but I think this looks like what would have happened if the Village People included the Braveheart theme.

  47. The lurker says:

    This photo’s like Vegas – it’d be cheezy, cringeworthy and oodles of awkward – if it wasn’t for its extreme AWESOMENESS.

    I think they nailed it. Which is lucky, because it’d be the worlds most terrible, awkward photo if they hadn’t.

  48. CatEns says:

    Is that a wolf head on his crotch? Hehehe, that’s great.

  49. georgierae says:

    I see this photo and all I can think is that dad’s got a squished foxhead on his skirt…

  50. Legacy says:

    lol I think I’m in love! Where can I find a man like that? Athough I am concerned with the construction of his axe blade- it doesn’t look like it could hold up in battle.

Leave a Reply

View Mobile Site
spread the awkwardness