Celebs Archives

Third Party Candidate

“Theresa May and one of the people running against her. His name was Lord Buckethead. He got 249 votes.”

“Chuck Norris admiring my friend’s dad’s cock in the 80’s.”

“I’m pretty sure Bill Murray noticed my dad trying to take this picture.”

“My wife met Chris Pratt. Anna Faris didn’t approve.”

“My grandpa might have forgotten to tell me he has a License to Kill.”

“As I snapped the selfie I told Samuel L. Jackson to pose how he really felt about doing these kinds of things.”

“My mom was told to tell the ‘homeless man’ he couldn’t loiter near her workplace.”

“My uncle used to look just like Ryan Reynolds when he was a West Virginia coal miner in the 70’s.”

“My uncle, after tripping and falling in front of the queen, 1987.”

“Olivia Wilde’s baby looks like he has a giant hand.”